A Better Way to Approach Confidence

Written by Diana Perkovic


Posted on September 08 2020

Confidence and empowerment go hand in hand. Or should I say TRUE confidence and empowerment go hand in hand. What's the difference between the two? And where does empowerment come into play?

As an Empowerment Coach, I talk to a lot of women and the top subject that inevitably comes up is confidence. As the conversation unfolds, lack of confidence seems to be the big issue that stands in the way of what women truly desire.

I’ve noticed a major trend of women approaching confidence for a specific situation or to gain a certain something.  

I call it “Situational Confidence”.

We are searching for confidence in a certain area for a specific outcome. For example, “I want confidence in the workplace so I can get promoted”, “I want confidence speaking to men so I can have a relationship”, “I want confidence being less shy so I can have more friends”, “I want more body confidence so I can have a better self-image”, “I want more confidence to use my voice”, “I want more confidence to make changes in my life” - the list goes on and on.

So what kind of confidence do we need to focus on building as women?

We all know that confidence comes from within, and yet, we’re always looking for confidence for specific things….we’re going to approach it differently - from Ground Zero. I want you to take a look at yourself, first. I’m approaching your confidence from within - the kind of confidence that comes from a woman’s self worth, knowing your value, who you are, feeling really good about yourself.

This is an empowered confidence.

Think of confidence as a brick of cheese, one with a lot of holes in it. We can have major confidence in one area, and be totally lacking confidence in another. And more often than not, it is the areas where we are lacking confidence that we so deeply desire it most. Women in The Good Girl Mafia Bootcamp have told me that the lack of confidence in those areas was paralyzing. They felt FROZEN. 

If you feel frozen, let me share with you what I share inside the Bootcamp. I coach women to focus on deep, inner confidence via their empowerment. By approaching confidence by way of empowerment first, we can tackle it in a different way that leaves you feeling at peace and skyrockets your self-worth. Dialing up your feeling of empowerment first will have you understanding your lack of confidence in certain areas in a new way. It will give you the strength to go to ground zero of it all, without shaming and blaming yourself for not being confident in that area in the first place.

The idea here is to stop treating the symptoms and get to the root cause. Let’s get off the hamster wheel of looking for “situational confidence”. Instead, we’ll take a look at how dialing up your empowerment FIRST will help you build firm and lasting confidence. 

Ask yourself the following questions with your definition of empowerment in mind, not the lack of confidence you feel. Shift from focusing on the lack to focusing on your feeling of empowerment. Go there and ask yourself:

  1. What is my personal definition of empowerment?

  2. How is that definition of empowerment reflected in my life?

  3. How is that definition of empowerment not reflected in my life?

  4. What would my life look like if I was totally empowered?

  5. How can I start applying my empowerment to my life TODAY?

This is where I began my empowerment journey. This first step was a reassessment of my life based on my personal empowerment and began to move toward that vision, instead of looking at the areas of my life that were a mess, telling myself, “well, if you had any confidence at all, you’d grow some courage and just get it together.” The shift made a massive difference and was the starting point to becoming an Empowerment Coach and running a Female Empowerment Company. Answer the questions honestly and it will give you a solid starting point for your empowerment journey.

The unvarnished truth is, we learn to live with things girls, don’t we? We begin to overcompensate in one area, favor another, and put the third on the backburner. We all do it - I did it, for a long time - too long. Somehow we end up going along to get along. But this global pause has many of us doing a massive reassessment of our lives and now we’re faced with truths that we were perhaps too busy before to even look at. And we want to reporioritze and shift things. And so finding, growing & unleashing your empowerment is the first step to get things moving. 

Empowerment before confidence.

If you've answered the questions and would like personalized guidance for your life changes and empowerment journey, Click here to learn more about the Good Girl Mafia Bootcamp - you can schedule your call with me and we can chat all things YOUR personal empowerment!



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